I think the best thing to do is to see a doctor, unless you can't?

I have very limited medical knowledge, so here's what I suggest:

1. Find something small, round and hard to bite.

2. Take a bottle of alcohol, and pour it gently over your shoulder.

3. Clench your teeth, and, using a butcher knife, slowly make an incision at the shoulder blade.

4. Disregard the pain as much as you can, and use a sawing motion to cut through bone and flesh until you reach the inner muscles of your shoulder.

5. So we can see past the blood, take some green paint and a paintbrush, and outline the edge of each muscle you feel.

6. Take a picture of your shoulder, and post it here. We'll compare it to the muscles of an unfortunate pedestrian that comes close to our house, and see which one is torn.

7. Go to the supermarket, shoulder still sliced open, and pick up some superglue and duct tape. Go back home, and follow our instructions to seal the damaged muscle and your arm.

8. In case of pain after the procedure, tell an emergency room operative everything that happened so he can laugh his ass off.

If that doesn't seem right, you should really see a doctor.

[This message has been edited by Silicone Ruff Jr (edited 07-18-2009 @ 02:44 AM).]

You're going to die.

I know which muscle you mean because I keep getting pains in it but I don't know why or how to fix it. I find it goes away after a few hours to a few days. No cutting needed. If its bad though take some painkillers.

Might be AIDS.

AIDS is yesterday. It's all about cancer these days.

It's the swine.

Bah, no one cares about the swine other than the paranoid.

If it's not always life threatening, it's nothing.

The media here have already dropped it. All we get now is an occasional update on the death toll, and then they move on to MJ: KING OF POP.

[This message has been edited by Tombit (edited 07-18-2009 @ 03:51 AM).]

Swine flu really is getting paranoid.

Off topic comment: The Media is paranoid. They drop everything through time and find their new 'donkey'/'peepole'.


Advising comment to Beauchamp: Do some stretching before sporting, running, any other physical harashments.

I THINK I JUST ATE SOME INFECTED SWINE BACON

Probably your anterior deltoid or your rotator cuff. Rest the arm, put ice on it, etc, and you'll probably be back to 100% shortly. If it doesn't go away after a few days, see a doctor.

@ Fo

I advise you contact your nearest Funeral Director and arrange a suitable will.



give it all to me plz

[This message has been edited by NomadicNoodle (edited 07-18-2009 @ 04:50 PM).]

Most people survive the Flu here, dw Fo ShoPig.

Maybe if you had a rubber arm like me this shit wouldn't happen.

But yeah if you were throwing, it's probably your rotator cuff.

No, you're experiencing the first sign of LEPRACY.

Your arm is just in the first stage of falling off.

The pain wears off in a week or two, once i've jumped off my bunk bed without remembering to let go of the top rail (lol), had the same conditions as you, and just remained calm. You could try some pain relievers or something, but i never needed any. GL

Tell the pain to go the !@#%$*!@ away.

You've a life to ruin, and girls to charm.
If you don't get your quota you'll never be happy again.
:P

I would say your rotator cuff due to the nature of the sport and the location of the injury. Apply P.R.I.C.E.
Or just basicly put ice on it to reduce any swelling and make it heal faster.

Whoever said rotator cuff injury is the winner, but I went online to see how long it takes to heal and it said 3-4 months! I don’t have the time! Im sure its not serious because I don’t feel any more constant pain but when I hold my shoulder up above my head it still hurts and Im not able to swim since it pin points the muscle. Am I really going to have to wait Months for this to heal?

Well maneuverability does seem like an issue.

I suggest purchasing a skill saw and cut the whole limb off. However. Be cautious doing this, have medical supplies ready (Such as a blow torch, or leftover fireworks) to seal the wound to prevent excess bleeding out. If you cut incorrectly please note the only way you'll be able to stop your eminent death is to jab sixteen toothpicks soaked in tea two hours prior. This should cauterize the wound.

If you fail to separate the limb (either completely or partially) consider professional medical treatment.

it said 3-4 months

How badly did you **** it up? Because if it's going to be a several-month recovery, you may as well get a doctor involved.

Then you'll be up & playing rugby.

you may as well get a doctor involved

Best idea yet.