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Age of Kings Heaven » Forums » Town's Crier » Splash Splash XLVIII: Speakeasy
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Topic Subject: Splash Splash XLVIII: Speakeasy
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Chocolate Jesus
Squire
(id: trebuchet king)
posted 10-27-13 07:38 PM CT (US)   

MOFF YOU DOUBLE POSTING CRETIN DIEEEEEEEEE




It's night in the city. The rain patters against the window like a distant Chicago typewriter. The street lamp outside shines through the shades, the slits of light that get through entwine with the cigarette smoke filling the air. It's the height of the Roaring Twenties, and the only thing clogging the air more than the omnipresent nicotine is indecipherable slang. So pull up a chair, and shut the door before any buttons show up.


Sigposts:
1 - Ax, being an angry Prohibitionist
500 - Felix is getting some "bribes" to not "shut the place down"
1000 - Looks like Ax shares Thymole's interest in bangtails.
1500 - John the Late hit the rams too hard and can't remember making this post.
1920 - CJ gets in early on the speakeasy business.
1942 - John is not keeping up with current events, which is understandable given his predicament.
2000 - Moff wanted to leave, but just kept coming back for more. Thanks for single-handedly keeping me in business. Well, you and John.
2500 -
There are a couple extra around, but they aren't advertising if you get my meaning.


Rules:

  • Use slang when ordering booze, we do try to at least look like a respectable establishment.
  • Don't go over the edge with rams, we don't want too many cops poking their noses in here.
  • If you need to do any ennui-filled monologues, use a phone booth in the back
  • No not smoking allowed.



Sing Sing

Spam it up and you'll wind up a jailhouse canary, ya see?








Hardboiled Sleuths
CJ, Private Eye
Coquenballs, Dick for Hire
Lurkur, house snooper
RedHandedJill was framed!
swaghetti yolonaise walks the walk
.		Dames
Ax, seen here.
Basse is one fine tomato!
Sipia is too young to be in here
Popey, femme fatale
HockeySam, a sister who skates around
.
.		Dope fiends
John the Late has the Reefer Madness
morgoth, a newsie out for a fix
Dark Reign, boozehound
Mithril Knight loves his muggles
Thymole is rather keen on bangtails
Jan dc something something AoFE		Hoods
Moff, known grifter.
Stroke moves bent cars
Reganknight bops off geese
TheIanOakley is always packing
TitanKing, the local kingpin
CV peddles nose candy
.		Coppers
Dead_End, an honest cop with nothing left to lose.
Felix, the Chief himself
Major Helper, a beat cop out to prove himself
.
.
.
.


Former joints:

Splash Splash XLVII - The First Splashtastic Empire by Moff (13-10-27, 2500)
Splash Splash XLVI - Dead Cthulhu Awakens by ax_man1 (13-6-6, 2500)
Splash Splash XLV - The Vatican of Pope Popeychops I by Popeychops (13-1-1, 2502)
Splash Splash XLIV: The Year That Never Should Have Been by CarolKarine (31-12-12*, 2502)
Splash Splash XLIII - The Dark Side Of The Splash by Felix36 (07-31-12, 2502)
Splash Splash XLII: Aperture Science by TitanKing (05-10-12, 2529)
Splash Splash XLI: The Splashclear Wasteland by Other White Meat (2-24-12, 2573)
Splash Splash XL: Splashplotation! by Lord Basse (11-28-11, 2541)
Splash Splash XXXIX - The Gentlemen's Banquet by Turty (07-22-11, 2514)
Splash Splash XXXVIII - The Spamish Inquisition by Lord Basse (02-17-11, 2513)
Splash Splash XXXVII - AoKH Gazette Times Weekly by morgoth bauglir (07-26-10, 2513)
Splash Splash XXXVI -- Ultra Hip Old School Edition by Aro (07-20-08, 1900)
Splash Splash XXXV: The Neo-Socialist-Sovereign-Arocratic Republic by Scud (02-22-08, 2501)
Splash Splash XXXIV: Rebuilding the Ark by Ornlu (10-25-07, 2542)
Splash Splash XXXIII: Order restored by Monk (08-30-07, 2514)
Splash Splash XXXII: Get Medieval! by Lord Basse (08-02-07, 2511)
Splash Splash XXXI: Open your window(s) by Snaily (5-20-07, 2557)
Splash Splash XXX: Pics inside by newIdea (03-03-07, 2523)
Splash Splash XXIX: Not the usual by Scud (01-01-07, 2500)
Splash Splash XXVIII: Brave New Thread by Cobra the Mediocre (11-20-06, 2500)
Splash Splash XXVII: Game Over byThunder77 (09-20-06, 2500)
Splash Splash (continuation of mooooooooooooo) -- Pirate Invasion by nav (07-31-06, 2500)
Splash Splash XXV: The Good Ol' Days by oliver (06-06-06, 2500)
Splash Splash XXIV: The Takeover by TheTrebuchet (05-02-06, 2500)
Splash Splash Part XXIII: Paint Wars by newIdea (04-12-06, 2500)
Splash Splash Part XXII: Return to Former Glory by Crimson Knight (03-24-06, 2500)
Splash Splash Part XXI: Return of El Presidante by WatchWood (03-06-06, 2500)
Splash Splash Part XX (Continuation of moooooo): Old School by Tonto_DaVe (01-02-06, 2501)
Splash Splash XIX: Three Years of Madness by kevo (10-12-05, 2500)
Splash Splash XVIII: Sanity is Overrated by FD2 (08-07-05, 2500)
Splash Splash XVII: The Enlightenment by MW (06-28-05, 2500)
Splash Splash XVI: The Spampire Strikes Back by trebuchet king (04-22-05, 2500)
Splash Splash XV: Spam Reduction by WatchWood (01-27-05, 2500)
Splash Splash XIV: Get Hyphy by Daddy (12-14-04, 2502)
Splash Splash XIII: kevo's revenge by kevo (11-14-04, 2500)
Splash Splash XII: Insanity is Bliss by Simfish II (09-27-04, 2501)
Splash Splash XI: There is No Ban Button by ax_man1 (08-28-04, 2500)
Splash Splash Part X: A New Age by Crimson Knight (08-17-04, 2500)
Splash Splash Part IX (Continuation of moooooo): Game 1 by Tonto DaVe (07-08-04, 2502)
Splash Splash Part VIII: Regurgitated by Raptor the Good (05-19-04, 2500)
Splash Splash VII - The Coma Continues by Darkmaster (03-29-04, 2500)
Splash Splash: Part VI- Continuation of mooooooooooo by zyxomma100 (02-08-04, 2500)
Splash Splash V: Resuscitated by nav (01-05-04, 2500)
Rattle, Rattle by Adder (11-19-03, 2500)
Splash, Splash IV: The Legacy Continues by Tonto Simfish (09-03-03, 2500)
Splash Splash: Part III- A New Beginning by zyxomma100 (06-23-03, 2500)
The New splash splash(continuation of moooooooooo) by Tonto Simfish (10-17-2002 / 10-17-2008, 23613)
splash splash(continuation of moooooooooo) by Tonto Simfish (?-?-01, 4823)
chirp chirp by dedkrikit (05-08-01, 2533)
Mooooooooo by cow_gone_mad (03-20-01, 7683)

*This is the fastest bootlegger in the business, he made the run in a mere 28 hours, 17 minutes
What do you get when you gobble down sweets?
Eating as much as an elephant eats?
What are you at getting terribly fat?
What do you think will come of that?
"Actually, my foreskin was stuck at the point where the pink bulb starts, and they cut it free."-Stroke
"Tonight, I pulled it back a bit too far and the opening of my foreskin is stuck beneath the head of my penis." -Pears

[This message has been edited by Joshooarh (edited 03-22-2014 @ 05:31 PM).]

Author
Replies:
ax_man1
Squire
posted 10-27-13 08:01 PM CT (US)     1 / 2501  
*kneecaps thread with a Louisville Slugger*

The Second Splashtasic Empire will rule you all!
ax_man1

Owner of a post 500, 1000, 1500, 2000, and 2500
Not all are in the same thread, but 4 of them are
Chocolate Jesus
Squire
(id: trebuchet king)
posted 10-27-13 08:24 PM CT (US)     2 / 2501  
It's just lazy, really. Moff didn't even TRY to think up a new theme. The Star Wars one had already worn out it's welcome by the time the last one ended, too.

I was going to do German Expressionism, but figured film noir would be a bit more accessible.
What do you get when you gobble down sweets?
Eating as much as an elephant eats?
What are you at getting terribly fat?
What do you think will come of that?
"Actually, my foreskin was stuck at the point where the pink bulb starts, and they cut it free."-Stroke
"Tonight, I pulled it back a bit too far and the opening of my foreskin is stuck beneath the head of my penis." -Pears
Kongou Dess
Moff
(id: Moff Yittreas)
posted 10-27-13 08:50 PM CT (US)     3 / 2501  
After this, I won't do SW anymore.
Purveyor of the Poi | Deliverer of Desu
Lord Sipia: "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SIPPY IS EXCLUDED! EVERYBODY LOSES THEIR SANITY" | Also Lord Sipia: "...Of course. Prepare the butter."
Hi, I'm Kongou! Are you my admiral?
Chocolate Jesus
Squire
(id: trebuchet king)
posted 10-27-13 09:09 PM CT (US)     4 / 2501  
I like you Moff, really I do. You're a valuable addition to the community and one of the most active people here.

But that SS could not be more half-assed if it was actually Matty's presidency.
What do you get when you gobble down sweets?
Eating as much as an elephant eats?
What are you at getting terribly fat?
What do you think will come of that?
"Actually, my foreskin was stuck at the point where the pink bulb starts, and they cut it free."-Stroke
"Tonight, I pulled it back a bit too far and the opening of my foreskin is stuck beneath the head of my penis." -Pears
John the Late
Knight
posted 10-27-13 09:16 PM CT (US)     5 / 2501  
Well TK no offense, but.... Star Wars > Film Noir. Lived for more than 40 years and will surely live at least another 20.
The AoKH Continuous Screenshot Competition X | The CSC Archives VI | Unnamed RP Map project - 99% finished
Chocolate Jesus
Squire
(id: trebuchet king)
posted 10-27-13 09:55 PM CT (US)     6 / 2501  
Well TK no offense, but.... Star Wars > Film Noir
You are arguing that a single franchise is better than an entire style of film-making, one which produced some of the most critically-acclaimed movies of all time. That's a bold claim, there.

Have you seen Casablanca? Please do, there's a reason it's on every "Best movie of all time" list ever.

More importantly, we already had that Splash Splash.
What do you get when you gobble down sweets?
Eating as much as an elephant eats?
What are you at getting terribly fat?
What do you think will come of that?
"Actually, my foreskin was stuck at the point where the pink bulb starts, and they cut it free."-Stroke
"Tonight, I pulled it back a bit too far and the opening of my foreskin is stuck beneath the head of my penis." -Pears
Mithril Knight
Squire
posted 10-27-13 10:28 PM CT (US)     7 / 2501  
*splash*
►►►►Mithril Knight◄◄◄◄
My Works
¡Viva México!
My Coat of Arms
John the Late
Knight
posted 10-27-13 10:30 PM CT (US)     8 / 2501  
Just as an SS theme oh my god not as a whole
The AoKH Continuous Screenshot Competition X | The CSC Archives VI | Unnamed RP Map project - 99% finished
CarolKarine
Squire
posted 10-27-13 10:42 PM CT (US)     9 / 2501  
but I support this thread
Proud owner of Splash Splash XLIV: Leave it there for someone to find, Which is on record for being the fastest thread to reach 2500 posts - which was completed in 28 hours and 17 minutes, from start to finish!
Yeah, the republican party is pretty much one big schizophrenic ball of contradictions nowadays. - Ax_man1
double post for milestone, then relentlessly bash on the community for the hell of it... stay classy thymole. - Lurker
Chocolate Jesus
Squire
(id: trebuchet king)
posted 10-28-13 00:46 AM CT (US)     10 / 2501  
<3
What do you get when you gobble down sweets?
Eating as much as an elephant eats?
What are you at getting terribly fat?
What do you think will come of that?
"Actually, my foreskin was stuck at the point where the pink bulb starts, and they cut it free."-Stroke
"Tonight, I pulled it back a bit too far and the opening of my foreskin is stuck beneath the head of my penis." -Pears
Dead_End
Cavalier
posted 10-28-13 01:49 AM CT (US)     11 / 2501  


I approve of this thread.
Black Forest Studios
Pitt_Man
Squire
(id: Dark_Reign)
posted 10-28-13 01:59 AM CT (US)     12 / 2501  
Poor Sam. Can't cop a break.
  _ » Downloads_. . . .________             
                   _ » The Continuous Screenshot Competition_. . . .________         
morgoth bauglir
Squire
posted 10-28-13 02:25 AM CT (US)     13 / 2501  
i lik dis thred moff is retard.
Morgoth Bauglir/Quaazi - BORINGMETAL HEADTWAT
Huidin's Belief - The Siege (4.4) - 2475 - Birth Of The Uruk-Hai (4.1) (Best Sound of 2008)
Signature currently under construction. If you want to help out and provide me with the resources needed, download from the above links.
Lord Basse
MI6 Scenario-Making Machine
posted 10-28-13 04:27 AM CT (US)     14 / 2501  
I endorse this Splash Splash!

*splashes fruminously*
__[]_________
|||||||||||||||||
The ||||||||||||||||| Hus
OF | [/ \] |¯| [/ \] | ME
______________________________________________________________________________ |__ _ |¯|____|_______________________________________________________________________________
The Relics of Athalën (5.0) | AoK Opus - 100,000+ downloads | StormWind Studios | "I consider the conversion of Basse to be one of the great triumphs of my modding crusade" - Matt LiVecchi
Feliks
Squire
(id: Joshooarh)
posted 10-28-13 05:13 AM CT (US)     15 / 2501  
Sorry Moff but I sorta like this one too. It's not that I dislike Star Wars, it's just that I dislike seven or so consecutive months of it.
Feliks
Squire
(id: Joshooarh)
posted 10-28-13 05:14 AM CT (US)     16 / 2501  
*splashysplashy*
Reganknight
Squire
(id: Reganknight1597)
posted 10-28-13 07:37 AM CT (US)     17 / 2501  
So which is the Splash Splash were going with? This of Moffs?
Dead_End
Cavalier
posted 10-28-13 07:42 AM CT (US)     18 / 2501  
All the cool fellows hang out at this joint.
Black Forest Studios
Major Helper
AoKH Survivor, Mr. White Teeth
posted 10-28-13 07:47 AM CT (US)     19 / 2501  
I'll also endorse this one, even though I know next to nothing about the theme
_,.-'~'-.,__,.-'~'-.,__,.-'~'-.,__,.-'~'-.,__,.-'~'-.,_
You, you... Finnish Barstool! - Enraged Popeychops
Major Helper: Helping AoE3H Housewives since 2008 - As_Saffah
I spent 3 months trying to convince a door that I was an intelligent life form and gave up. - TLM
Winner of "Nicest" (2012-2016), "Most Helpful" (2014) and "Best Moderator" (2015-2016) Forummer Awards
-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-=x=-
TheIanOakley
Squire
posted 10-28-13 08:03 AM CT (US)     20 / 2501  
Let splashing commence.
Dead_End
Cavalier
posted 10-28-13 08:05 AM CT (US)     21 / 2501  
Barkeep, get me one of your best whiskeys.
Black Forest Studios
Popeychops
"Cool" Huskarl
posted 10-28-13 08:06 AM CT (US)     22 / 2501  
Bartender, a Scotch highland springwater if you please.
Member of BlackForest Studios
Co-creator of Silent Evil (4.6) Voted Best Multiplayer Scenario of 2009 (Most Fave'd Multiplayer Scenario)
and The Seas of Egressa (4.8) Voted Best Multiplayer Scenario of 2010
"Popey just hates everywhere." - Chocolate Jesus, on my fear of Romanian organ-traffickers
"Hooray for Dear Leader-Comrade-Generalissimo-Presidente-Lord Protector Popey!" - Lord Sipia, on my benevolent, iron-fisted rule
"You're not Popeychops; you don't get to physics." - Moff, in response to a clumsy muon simile

[This message has been edited by Popeychops (edited 10-28-2013 @ 11:50 AM).]

Popeychops
"Cool" Huskarl
posted 10-28-13 08:10 AM CT (US)     23 / 2501  
*High fives the other whisky drinker*
Member of BlackForest Studios
Co-creator of Silent Evil (4.6) Voted Best Multiplayer Scenario of 2009 (Most Fave'd Multiplayer Scenario)
and The Seas of Egressa (4.8) Voted Best Multiplayer Scenario of 2010
"Popey just hates everywhere." - Chocolate Jesus, on my fear of Romanian organ-traffickers
"Hooray for Dear Leader-Comrade-Generalissimo-Presidente-Lord Protector Popey!" - Lord Sipia, on my benevolent, iron-fisted rule
"You're not Popeychops; you don't get to physics." - Moff, in response to a clumsy muon simile
Lord Sipia
Squire
posted 10-28-13 10:43 AM CT (US)     24 / 2501  
*has missed all of the previous*
Moff, trying to be the same host twice in a row is already boring enough, but using the exact same theme is just digging your own boring, boring grave.

Oh, and one soda, please. I don't drink alcohol. *dons headphones to drown out the "wuss" chant*
"Have you ever had a dream that you thought was impossible to achieve? Well, some people say nothing is impossible. But I do nothing every day! So you can definitely do it."
--Tofu the dog's infinite wisdom

"British English is easy! Just use an 's' instead of a 'z' and replace 'or' with 'our' and you're dandy." "Do you want pissa our noodles for dinner?" "u better not piss in r noodles m8"
--Classic exchange between Popeychops and John the Late
Kongou Dess
Moff
(id: Moff Yittreas)
posted 10-28-13 11:06 AM CT (US)     25 / 2501  
I was considering changing it... do I still have a shot?
Purveyor of the Poi | Deliverer of Desu
Lord Sipia: "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SIPPY IS EXCLUDED! EVERYBODY LOSES THEIR SANITY" | Also Lord Sipia: "...Of course. Prepare the butter."
Hi, I'm Kongou! Are you my admiral?
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